Corrupt-A-Wish

[Kegereneku]

I wish that I had a good wish.

Wish granted, you have a good wish idea but don't understand what made it good. Empowered by the sudden success of that one wish, you loose self-control and feel a sudden urge to make a ton of them, even selling your next wish as THE BIG ONE, raisin expectation. Unfortunately you don't actually know how to make a good wish, and the very next corruption you do will disappoint everybody.

I wish to own a supercar and this wish must be granted using exactly 3 or exactly 5 lines of texts (including line break).


(WARNING: ME CONTINUING TO BE PEDANTIC BELOW, disregard if not interested)
The length of the corruption have little to do with the concern, frankly all I suggest myself is that we wonder, just a second "am I overdoing it?", instead of just trying to match the previous post size.

Then, while I recognize my wording could be better, please read again fellow forum member.
- You created an alternate universe in which you control everything of what happen in the future
The point is more about taking the cheap route and rather than corrupting the wish itself until it give the result you want, taking control instead of whatever universe concerned and coerce barely correlated stuff into AN ILLOGICAL horrible ending.
Also, I didn't say THIS ONE applied to every recent post, I said it was a bad sign.

EX: "I wish for a cookie"
POOR CORRUPTION : "you choke on it and die, then your cat eat your flesh, then your house burn because of something you forgot on the fire, then it is transported to hell because the cat hated you and made a pact with the devil and you stay there choking forever, every other member of the forum looking for a new house visit and look at you in disdain (btw, I will remind people to look up for that idée fixe every now and then).

AT LEAST BETTER CORRUPTION : "You get a cookies, it is packaged in a very hard to open packet, as you finally force open the packet it crumbled in piece all over the place. munching a bit as you try to clean up you discover it doesn't have a flavor you like. But this is too late. The taste stay in your mouth. The bit you accidentally swallowed give you diarrhea. Later said diarrhea keep you busy long enough to miss the TV alert about a bunch of poisoned cookies and that you should call for emergency before it is too late. By then, it is still too late."
(rate the above if you wish, I don't fear criticism)

A reference, reference to what?

"You make a reference to something beyond the post containing the wish" (also including common sense)
Do you know that feeling when you ask someone for the time, and he start telling you about his holiday that you know absolutely nothing about? THAT'S what I wish to avoid.

- What you grant disregard the actual wish and only serve to push your own idea forward.
"small tangent" you say? Should I remind the time someone TOTALLY DISREGARDED a wish to try to force a call back to something nobody else knew about?
Again, I didn't say THIS ONE applied to every recent post, I said it was a bad sign.

All those complaints I just argued against tells me you don't like how anyone corrupts their wishes when it on a tangent. If that means you don't like reading long corruptions then just look at the beginning and skip to the wish the poster makes. If you just don't like people making complex corruptions because you think it could be done easily with a few sentences then just deal because we are free people on this forum

I recognize a too big bias on the size of the corruption, however being "free" is no excuse to not stay on topic and disregard suggestion to make the topic more likable.

On this, I have nothing more to say andI will, as you say, just skip the post and maybe jump into a cryostasis casket in the hope those making bad wish/corruption go extinct and I wake up in a glitterworld paradise.

[NeverPire]

Happy man, your wish has been granted, you now possess a gorgeous supercar.
You have just one problem : you are not a super-man so the car is not designed for your normal capacities
Fortunately, you know it and avoid to drive but the temptation is too great and one day you wheel.
I do not make you a drawing.
What had to happen happened !

Edit : Almost forget to make a wish
I wish to be telepathic at the times I want.

[gipothegip]

Granted, however it takes a lot of mental resources to achieve and leaves you exhausted and causes migraine headaches. Furthermore, most people will be shocked and horrified by your ability to invade their minds.

I wish to be able to travel through hyperspace and be capable of making transversable wormholes to make shortcuts through our universe.

[AllenWL]

Wish granted.
However, you have no idea on how to navigate though hyperspace, making all your hyperspace journeys basically a coin-toss to see if you arrive where you want, except the coin has a infinite amount of sides, and there's only one side you want.
Luckily, your wormhole-shortcut ability works much better, and you are able to make wormhole shortcuts everywhere.
Not so luckily, you have no way to get rid of your wormholes once made, meaning you have to be very careful to make sure you don't make a wormhole in a bad position. However, by the time you realize, your are hospitalized from malaria caused by a mosquito which traveled through one of your wormholes. The mosquito goes on to cause a malaria epidemic in your region.

I wish the 'Count to 9000 before tynan posts' thread ended already.

[{insert_name_here}]

Wish granted. The next day, the "Count to 9000 before tynan posts" thread is unexplainably and mysteriously locked. Then it is deleted. Everyone is disappointed because they got so close to 9000 and they decide not to start another one because it would take too long. Many of the Ludeon Forum users lose an incentive to post content on the forums. Soon, the entire forum is abandoned. Rimworld's community slowly dies and soon nobody is interested in the game. After a few months, Ludeon Studios goes bankrupt and Tynan spends the rest of his life as a homeless alcoholic, begging for food scraps on the side of the road.

I wish that I was immortal, BUT also have the option to end my own life at any time.

[catter]

Granted, you are now immortal with the power to end your life at any time. To achieve this, you first take a pill to become immortal and grab a knife that would be able to end your life. To get more detail, the knife is covered in a dull, grey substance that undoes the pill you just took.

OPTION 1: You do amazing stunts and get lots of money. This fame makes you feel very good and you stay happy all your life. Then you meet a girl who you believe is the love of your life. You hitch up together and it goes great for a while, but it later goes south and you become depressed because of this loss. To make matters worse, it has been 2500 years since you took your pill and the knife is very shiny with nothing on it. When you try to use it, it acts like a normal knife and the substance that was on it can't be replaced.

OPTION 2 (for a weirder and maybe more enjoyable story): Now that you are immortal, you will never die. The first day you test it out by riding your car into a brick wall without seat-belts. You of course survive, but you then want to show the world your ability. The doctor that gave the pill disagrees with you and wants to keep you under surveillance. You don't care then and try to publicly appear trying to kill yourself, but men in black suits somehow stop you from getting hurt. This infuriates you and you then vow to kill these men in black suits. To do this you learn to fight very well and to kill quickly. This training helps you in your attack on the lab.
It is all quiet at night, and many people are guarding the lab from assault with easy-to-hide weapons and well trained agents. You walk silently to the front door and break in with the greatest of ease. You then run into a few agents and terminate them very quickly and quietly. The next thing to happen is you walking into the lab and taking out more guards without much sound. When you look for the doctor, he is not there. This causes you to be frustrated and you look frantically and loudly. This brings in lots of agents and you take out most of them. While you are fighting, the doctor walks in casually and grabs a knife. This knife is handed to another agent who is immortal. You start to fight him, but figure out he is as able to be killed as you are. This causes you to pull out your knife and to fight him with it. It is a stalemate until you are shot by the doctor with a dart gun which distracts you long enough to be stabbed. You start to fall to the ground, but land one last slash at the agent's leg and you cut a major artery. Both of you die and the doctor suicides from failure to create the ultimate human.

EX: "I wish for a cookie"
POOR CORRUPTION : "you choke on it and die, then your cat eat your flesh, then your house burn because of something you forgot on the fire, then it is transported to hell because the cat hated you and made a pact with the devil and you stay there choking forever, every other member of the forum looking for a new house visit and look at you in disdain (btw, I will remind people to look up for that idée fixe every now and then).

AT LEAST BETTER CORRUPTION : "You get a cookies, it is packaged in a very hard to open packet, as you finally force open the packet it crumbled in piece all over the place. munching a bit as you try to clean up you discover it doesn't have a flavor you like. But this is too late. The taste stay in your mouth. The bit you accidentally swallowed give you diarrhea. Later said diarrhea keep you busy long enough to miss the TV alert about a bunch of poisoned cookies and that you should call for emergency before it is too late. By then, it is still too late."
(rate the above if you wish, I don't fear criticism)

I could be pedantic here, but I don't feel like it. I will say one thing, I don't see a difference between those corruptions besides that one is more aggressive than the other. (i.e. the first is more than the second)

How about we make a compromise: if someone wants to make a tangent corruption, they must also make a boring corruption like I did. Deal?

I wish for a car made for cats.

[{insert_name_here}]

Wish granted.

Boring corruption: You get the car. Then spontaneously catches on fire. Then an asteroid hits the Earth and all humans die.

Semi-reasonable corruption: Wish granted. You get your car made for cats. The instructions manual is in another language and the car requires pure diamonds to be used as fuel. It can only fit the smallest of cats and the seats are lined with spikes.

I wish everyone wasn't so pedantic about corruptions, we all just follow the rules outlined in the OP and we have less arguments over corruptions.

[catter]

Wish granted, the next day you find this forum being spammed by corruption trolls and the post count rises by the second. This inevitably causes you to quit posting here and live a real life. Meanwhile, all the useless posts become so unruly that the thread is deleted and all those posts are gone. Soon enough though, another thread is started and is spammed again and to stop it requires the loss of the whole forum. Hey, at least no one was pedantic and the rules were followed.

I wish to get some normal corruptions instead of some having to do with how pedantic other people's opinions are.

[Kegereneku]

Wish granted, you get some normal corruptions as everybody completely ignore anything that could be seen as a pedantic opinion, soon evolving to ignoring and mocking any opinions about wish quality. As a result the quality of "normal" corruption drop as fair opinions goes unheeded.
Typical "normal corruption" are now typically "YOU DIE" preceded by nonsensical stuff out of a random word generator.


I wish to be a vigilante like Batman (but with Dragons as my heroish theme)

I wish everyone wasn't so pedantic about corruptions, we all just follow the rules outlined in the OP and we have less arguments over corruptions.

Just because someone wrote rules first don't mean you can't suggest improvement.

[catter]

Granted, you are now Draco a very smart vigilante who uses the theme of dragons. You go by day and fight everyone you think is bad. You use balls of chemicals that burst into flames when they come into contact with an object. You can also glide for 3-4 seconds. The only problem is, you now think like a dragon. When you see a lot of riches, you steal it and try to hoard it. This soon ends with you going to jail and rotting in a solitary cell. Your charges were for grand theft and killing suspects in many murder or robbery crimes.

I wish for a new set of ideas for my next few arguments in a long debate in a thread.

[Listen1]

I wish for a new set of ideas for my next few arguments in a long debate in a thread.

Granted, but all your ideas came via psychography in a language that you didn't understand and couldn't relate. You start researching these as you fall deeper and deeper into madness as you try to figure out the meaning of these only to fail and have more to translate every single day.

...
I wish for longer days

[Kegereneku]

Wish granted, a new star appear out of nowhere and turn the Solar system into a binary star system. Earth is now illuminated by two sun with a 30% increases in day time (from sunup to sunset).
Put aside the resulting global warming that Trump is proud to finally prove was never manmade, every living being on earth evolved their biological clock for millions of years, as a result many species go extinct and human have a lot more trouble sleeping.
Not getting enough sleep and because of the rising temperature, lot of irascible immigrant break walls and fences to get into cooler country. Eventually causing a world war, preventing country to cooperate and find a way to save earth.


I wish I knew the secret of the gods.

ps: well done catter, this is why you don't bring a cat in the dragon's lair !

[gipothegip]

Granted, however the secrets are very complex, and there may very well be a reason they are secret to begin with. You know the secrets, but you can't quite comprehend or understand them. The answers just lead to more questions.

Everybody dies... it's an existential truism ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I wish this forum allowed for proper lenny faces (or at least I knew the font to get it right).

[catter]

Granted, now Lenny can be made in many fonts on this forum; however, this causes the forum to look weird due to error in the coding. The title is fine, but every other word looks weird because of multiple fonts used on that one word. Even Wingdings are used making it hard to decipher what the title of the thread is.

Wish granted, a new star appear out of nowhere and turn the Solar system into a binary star system. Earth is now illuminated by two sun with a 30% increases in day time (from sunup to sunset).

This couldn't be a star created by Jupiter crushing in on itself from a bunch of monoliths? Does it?
I mean, it isn't 2010 so why bring up an old event? We want the stuff that is happening NOW!
Not really, I liked 2010. BTW, why did you make a corruption that showed your political ideals, especially since it is related to something outside the wish and makes an ending you want?

I wish to be the most powerful genie in the universe.

[JimJammer89]

Granted, you are now a spirit that resides in a an India style lamp. Like all other genies, you can't leave your lamp unless someone rubs it and you can only use your incredible power to grant the wishes of others. But unlike other genies, you can grant any wish in any way. Just have to wait for a person to rub your lamp. Any day now.

It has now been two centuries, and you are still stuffed in a small, dark lamp, slowly losing your sanity.

I wish that all people were shown the errors of their ways AND learn from this showing.