Sandstone Valley: We Landed Here 2. [NSFW] Alpha 4f

[ShadowDragon8685]

So I finally got around to deciding to get back into Rimworld. It's been a while! I figured I'd wait a few iterations, see what changes had been wrought. I'm going into this basically blind. Anyway...

Day 1, Hour 0: Fuck My Life
From the diary of Alice Lovegood.

So, there I was, enjoying a nice, long hypersleep, when BAM! Alarms start going off, you get literally blasted from your hypersleep coffin, smoke is filling the compartment, and fuck-knows what's going on.

The ship is burning, I'm screaming at the top of my lungs for my sister, and she grabs my hand. We run for the lifeboat bay, only to hear the sound of a gun going off. Some... Some big guy is pointing guns at everybody, there's four, five girls already on the decks, he's screaming that none of us bitches are going with him and screaming for someone named "Mark" to join him. I dunno, but he points the gun at me and asks me if I wanna die now, or die when the ship burns up.

Then some big girl hits him from the side. I don't mean "big" as in "obese", though she could probably have stood to have missed a few cheeseburgers. I mean that this girl towers a foot over him (okay, he wasn't all that tall, but still!) and is built like a giantess. She plows into him like a freight car, smashes his head into the airlock, headbutts him senseless, grabs his gun and my sister's hand, and drags the two of us into the escape pod.

It was sized for ten, but that was when "Mark" showed up. He had a shotgun, and I panicked. I slapped at the controls, and the next thing I knew, we were off the ship, hurtling towards the planet below. The pod got knocked up, but thankfully made it down more or less in one piece. Well, "less" in one piece, but they overbuild things on those interstellar ships, and the lifeboat had escape pods of its own.

We land shortly after our lifeboat had crashed and self-buried itself in the sand, thankfully scattering at least some of the supplies over the sands before we hit. So... FML. Now I'm stranded on a fucking Rimworld.

I guess I should introduce myself, for whatever ghoul is going to be picking over this diary in a few years or centuries. My name is Alice Lovegood, but everybody calls me Lovey. I'm from an Urbworld that was called "Diane". Unimaginative, I know. I'm fifteen.

My sister's name is Laura, she's three years older than me. Obviously, she has the same last name as me, and everybody calls her Luna.  Something about an ancient book older than the Bible or something, I dunno. Anyway...

Well, we got caught... And tried, and convicted, something about the authorities not liking us having participated in an armed robbery, but, you know... We were hungry! So they put us in a hypersleep simulation to give us a colonist type training. My sister and I both picked 'Herbalist' because it sounded cool and mysterious, and we spent the next five or so years in a simulation of being medieval exiles on some medieval world, starting a village and living off the land, doing herbs and stuff. It was kind of cool.

Then they shipped us off. We got put on an interstellar, back into hypersleep (No sims this time,) to go live somewhere the hell else. And then, well, see above, under "So there I was."


Anyway, that's the two of us, but there's three of us here. That brings me to number three, the girl built like a truck who saved our lives. Her name is Genevieve Langley, though she tells us to call her Gen. Gen's from the same system as us, though she lived on stations all her life. She grew up with a fantastic number of phobias, according to her, and got over it by taking up working in a cantina. She was perfect for the job, since she was built like a truck and easily capable of keeping rowdy patrons in line. She's seventeen, which is kind of hard to imagine, but when she put her hair up in pigtails, suddenly I see it.

So, here we are. Three girls from the same planet, lost. And you want to know what's the most fucked-up about it?

We're not even in a nice forest. We're in a desert - a fucking desert! I don't even know if half of what I learned in the herbalist sims is going to help us... But, well, we'd better do something, soon.


Looking around, Luna says we have a few things going for us here. First off, we obviously have survival fabrication tools, so we can build stuff without, you know, needing to be expert engineers and shit.

Secondly, we landed right next to some old ruin. It's pretty simple: just a square room on the sand. It's got no walls, but also has no roof, and the scans from our pods as we came down show it to be empty. So we can tear a wall out, put up a door of some sort or another, and sleep there. Thirdly, there's a steam geyser immediately south of it - and I do mean immediately. We can probably have someplace to sleep that's lit all night long built in about, ooh... Well, probably before nightfall tomorrow. We're gonna get started on that.

It beats sleeping on sand. Anyway... well, I kind of want to take this bad girl and tear some rock up! Oh, and my sister took the pistol, and I took a rifle that fell with us. Just like old times.

Day 1, Hour 13
We've been working all morning. We've got a door and some roofing up over the old stone shack, we're going to build some beds, but we need more metal if we're going to illuminate our lives any time soon. We're mining an outcropping that was south of us, but for fuck's sake, it's raining. FML.

Day 2, Hour 4
Well, I slept in a bed last night. Luna and Gen didn't, they hauled throughout the night. Anyway, someone's wandering through!

Her name is Meowski Davidson, it seems. She's twenty-five, and it looks like she's a joywire artist. She won't do labor, and she's afraid of fires. She's also a paranoid empath, who seems to be a villager from some local village called Cab Driver's Hill.....

Yeah. Just keep moving right along there, crazy lady...

Day 2, Hour 20
So! As promised, we have shelter with light and a food dispenser. I mean, it's a nutrient paste dispenser, eugh, but it's better than nothing. It's also crammed in along with our beds, with its hoppers and stuff, but hey, it's still something.

We talked with the crazy lady who passed on by. The news is not great. There's five factions 'round these parts.

There's Cab Driver's Hill, an outlander town. They don't like us. They don't like anyone. But they don't hate us. That's the good news. The bad news?

There's a tribe of feral people called the Black Ant Camino. They really hate us. They hate everybody. They may or may not be cannibals.

Then there's three pirate bands: the Sword Partners, the Red Spears, and the Soldier Group. They hate everybody and want to pillage, plunder, maim and murder.

We took one look at that shit and asked her if we could come join her town. She told us if we followed her, she'd lead us all into tribal country and let them pick our bones clean. We elected not to follow the crazy paranoid empath.

FUUUUUUUUUUCK! My! Life!

Well... I guess we're boned, but we may as well keep trying, right?

[RedStorm58]

YES,YES,YEEEESSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ShadowDragon8685]

Day 2, Hour 20
From the diary of Laura Lovegood

So, here we are. My little sister is taking this surprisingly well. She may rant and rave, but I don't think she's feeling well and truely hopeless the way I'm feeling right now.

I kind of just want to curl up and cry, but I can't do that. Lovey and Gen are counting on me, and I'm counting on them... Great.

I'm not sure what's more important at the moment. I'm torn between "Individual rooms" and "food." Rooms for ourselves is a tempting idea, if only because Gen likes to masturbate before going to sleep, and it makes it very, very hard for me to get to sleep... Which is why I'm currently writing in my diary instead of sleeping. And food because, duh, I like to eat!

And on the food topic, we have a split of opinion, between the options of putting together a farm of some sort, or trying to figure out hydroponics and building a grow room. I think grow room. It's less open, you know?

And, hey, nothing says someone can't sleep in the grow room! I'm going to pitch the idea to the girls, maybe bore out the stone hill south of our stone hut.

And I just realized, I use the word "and" to start sentences a lot, don't I? Oh well.

Day 3, Hour 11
Yay, cargo pods...

They appear to have crashed with potatoes in boxes. I don't know why potatoes in boxes, but yay! We're going to go haul them in, suspending the digging.

Day 4, Hour 0
Two things are worrying me at present.

Firstly, Gen masturbating in her bed is making me horny, and I'm afraid if I start up, she'll want to have sex with me. I'm not sure that's a problem, but then there's the possibility Lovey will get involved somehow, and... Messy.

Secondly, my survival handbook is suggesting that we may soon come under attack by pirates and ought to be building defensive turrets. This is not good news.

Thirdly... Three things are bothering me at present. Thirdly, some of those villagers from Cab Driver's Hill are "visiting". One of them is an old woman packing a pistol, identified as a town guard. The other is... Well, there's no easy way to put this, he's a man.

They don't have those where we come from. Our whole solar system was named "Amazonia" for a reason. We used various tricks of technology to get pregnant, and our genes were all tweaked to prevent any possibility of male children. So, we've only seen one once before - when he was waving a gun in our face on the ship.


I don't know what they want. I don't like it... But we have to coexist with these people.

Day 4, Hour 18

Fucking boomrat. Came right up to our stockpile and ate one of our meals! Gen and I, we're scrambling to grab up all the other resources around the valley - survival meals, fallen potatoes, whatever - and haul them back. The outsiders, they... Just seem to be chilling. Maybe they're sizing us up, I dunno. They talk a lot, we talk some.

I don't like the look of that guy. He hasn't got any breasts or anything, but... Nothing to be done about it.

Day 5, Hour 4
It's been raining since last night. The visitors left in the night. We're putting up a quick improvised defense, just in case. Um... I guess some sandbags and turrets qualify, right? These things are pretty shitty, they look like they'd just blow up if they get damaged. Best not put them close to our sandbags.

Also, there appears to be an eclipse on. No sunlight, not that it sweats us, with our GEOTHERMAL GENERATOR BITCHES!

Sorry, I think I channeled my sister there.

In other news, that deposit of metal in the hill south of us just seems to keep on going!

Day 6, Hour 8
It seems a squirrel has gone mad. We're going to have to kill it... It's just a squirrel, though.

Day 6, Hour 10

HAH! Lovey nailed that thing with her rifle. Good times.

Day 7, Hour 0
A luddite rebel from Cab Driver's Hill is passing through. We don't have anything to do with her, and vice versa.

In other news, Gen is demanding we name this "colony". I don't know why the hell we're gonna bother, but...

I look around. I see sand. I see stone. Sandstone Valley it is. Let's get back to work.

Day 9, Hour 0
Great. More fucking visitors from Cab Driver's Hill, come to... I dunno. Gawk at three teenagers?

It's a mixed group. "Shonja", an armed guard, a really old woman. "Engie", a middle-aged woman who hates foreigners (why'd you come here, bitch?) Tynan, another man, an armed guard, and Boozer, a middle-aged man (I guess?) another armed guard... They're all packing heat, really. Lovely.

Day 9, Hour 5
Oh fuckfuckfuck!

Pirates! A bunch of those wankers from "The Soldier Group" are attacking immediately.

...

With all of our armed visitors still around. Hopefully, they'll pitch in with us. We're hurrying to our sandbags.

...

Well, that went... Better than it could have gone. The three pirates who attacked us are down, we're not. We're going to quickly partition off a section of the hollowed-out hill (still under hollowing) to be a prisoner bed for the one woman among them. The Cab Drivers can take the others, we'll have their guns.

... The Cab Drivers didn't care about the others. Fuck 'em. But this girl? From what we found on her, she's a caveworld tender-cum-bartender-cum pirate (somehow?)

She's Gen's age. Huh.

Anyway, time for bed. Our captive is sleeping restlessly, Gen's injured but mobile. She stopped to blow the two who were left on the ground away.....

I'm glad I didn't see that. Eugh.

[Coenmcj]

Good to see this starting back up, I'm interested to see where this goes. Good luck!

[ShadowDragon8685]

Day 10, Hour 14
From the diary of Genevieve Langley

Being shot isn't so bad.

What's bad is recovering. It hurts like a bitch, and I can't move my arms much. Fuck.

In other news, the Lovegoods have dug graves and tossed those two guys into them, which is good. They have our unwelcome visitor restrained in a small room; they took her food, are trying to chat her around to our way of thinking.

That's good, I guess. I don't want to kill her. She looks to be about our age, I'm sure those barbarians were making her do it.


They're back to work, hauling stuff, digging out the hill that's going to feed us... When and if we get that stupid research table up. I reminded them of it, they have the bench up. I'm going to take a stab at figuring out this mess just as soon as I'm out of bed.

Day 11, Hour 5
Another group from Cab Driver's Hill has shown up to visit. I don't know why they seem to like visiting so damn much, but as long as they're not going to cause us trouble, I guess I don't mind.

I noticed we were low on food, so I send the herbalist girls out to cut some raspberries. I haven't seen them excited before.

Day 11, Hour 14
It seems a Muffalo has gone mad. Hopefully the visitors will tear it apart.

...

That didn't take long. It's dead, which is good, but we don't have a butcher's table, and none of us really want to do that. We offered to let the Cab Drivers take it home, but they were uninterested, so we tossed it away from camp and went back to our business.

Day 14, Hour 21
Well, I've finished this research. I guess it's not as hard as I thought. We're going to fit the hollowed hill up as a growing lab. Not entirely sure how to contain Maldonado while we do it. I want to give her a lamp so she won't be so unhappy. We already upgraded her from sleeping on the floor to an actual bed.

In other news, an escape pod landed. It's a man... And he's a brigand. The girls and I talk it over; we don't trust men. Maybe they tweaked our genes so we wouldn't, or maybe it's just... I dunno, cultural. Either we, we don't trust him, and we especially don't trust a brigand man.

Since I already capped those two bandits who came earlier, they gave me the job. I went out, and...

It took me a while, my hands were shaking so bad, but I finally shot him 'till I was sure he was dead. Then I dug a hole, threw him in it, and took his gun back to, well, home... I feel nasty, but it had to be done.

We can't trust that kind.

Day 23, Hour 15
Another muffalo's gone berzerk. We're all getting out of bed to deal with it.

Day 16, Hour 8
Well, Maldonado's cell is looking better. She has a bed, a lamp, a smoothed stone floor. We're very low on food, so we're going to go harvest more, fast, THEN try to get the grow-up going.

Strawberries make better nutrient paste, I think. Or are they raspberries? Whatevs.

Day 16, Hour 11
Woohoo! Cargo pods fell from the sky with food. Excellent! Looks like they have... Agave fruit?

I'll shove anything down my gob at this point! Who knows, it might be good.

Day 18, Hour 0
Well, Maldonado looks like she might, miiiiight, come 'round to our side... Eventually.

We've collected a lot of food, so now we're ready to make the growing operation.

Next on the agenda after that: individual fucking rooms!

Day 18, Hour 11
Cargo pods fell from the sky. They appear to have had... Shells? Artillery shells?

What the ever-loving shit are we gonna do with those? We're ignoring them for now.

Day 19, Hour 9
Yay! Maldonado finally gave in and agreed to join us. I don't know if we successfully Stockholmed her, convinced her she was finally safe with us, or some combination thereof... But either way, she's working with us now.

[ShadowDragon8685]

Day 19, Hour 12
From the diary of Lovey Lovegood.

I hate to say it, things are looking.... Well, kind of up. We recruited that Maldonado girl - she has a rough story, let me tell you - and we're now looking into building individual rooms for each of us.


First up is a cafeteria. We wanted to go with wooden floors 'cause it's fast and cheap, but we need more wood, so we're gonna put up the walls, then head out to chop some wood.

Day 19, Hour 20
Well, things just got... Interesting.

Another survivor landed! We're going to hurry to rescue her. According to the escape pod, her name is Sonia Bright, and she was... A Medieval noble?

Great. She's fucking useless. We're trying to talk her into joining us, but she's adamant that she will not do work. Which is weird, because she grew up as a caveworld tender, and she's only 19... Fucking A.

Day 22, Hour 4
Okay, so I noticed some red squirrel thing in the wall-frame we built for our new digs... Aaaaaaaaaaand when I shot it, it BLEW UP and set the grass on fire, and now the grass fire spread to the walls, so I ran away. I'm just gonna... Well, pretend I don't know what happened. Fire? What fire?

In other news, another escape pod landed. Her name is ...

HOLY SHIT IT'S MINYOUNG KIM!

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I love her work! We're going to HAVE to rescue her! Hurry!

Day 23, Hour 4
Okay, well, this was NOT my best-ever plan, I'll be perfectly honest. The fire is raging out of control. Who would have thought that FUCKING GRASS AND METAL could burn so well?

None of us have a clue what to do or how to get a raging scrub fire under control. It's smoky and nasty and I just want it to stoooooooooop!

...

Okay, finally it's raining. Let's hope that gets this mess under control. Note to self: do NOT shoot the red fucking rats! They go boom!

...

Okay, the fire's finally fucking out. Nobody got hurt, just coughed a little. We'll do better next time.

Day 25, Hour 10
Well, things WERE going well. Bright agreed to join us, but she still refuses to work. And now there's a solar flare, so nothing's working! I'm still trying to get Min to join us, but she's kind of in complete and total denial about what's going on, every time I try to tell her, she just shuts down.

UGH!

How can someone I gushed over, a woman I creamed my panties thinking about, be so Fucking. Useless?!

Never meet your idols, I guess.

Bright seems to be of SOME use... She's trying to get Min to join us.

Day 26, Hour 0
Is it midnight? I can't tell with both an Eclipse and a solar flare! On the other hand, the cooler temperatures are nice.

After my little experiment with HIGHLY FLAMMABLE WILDLIFE, we've decided to pour some concrete around everything that can catch fire, just in case.

...

The eclipse finally passed. I'm so glad to not be eating raw strawberries!

Day 28, Hour 3
Fucking hell. A blight wiped out our crops...

We should be good, but it's still annoying. We're gonna harvest some agave plants, just in case.

Day 29, Hour 17
Min finally joined us. Yay![/sarcasm]
In other news, we figured out that Bright and Min will do research, thus freeing up Gen. We also learned that Min wasn't totally useless; she will do construction, repair, and cooking.

Day 30, Hour 9
Um... Okay.

Some cougar called Erkki showed up with a shotgun and said she was joining us. She was a medi-world slave as a child, and turned into a military commissar somewhere along the way.

Well, um... I'm not gonna complain. But we need more metal, badly. Gonna go mining soon.

[ShadowDragon8685]

Day 31, Hour 15
The Diary of Min

Like, what the fuck, right?

I finally got enough money to get the hell off that stinking, choking urbworld and go to a nice glitterworld, my kind of place, and the ship blows the fuck out of itself. So I stumble into an escape pod, and then I land here, finding all these fucking teenagers running around with guns and shit.

I can be forgiven for losing it a bit after that, right?


So, anyway, it took them a while to bring me around, and oh my god, this place is atrocious. A concrete-slabbed fucking couple of shacks and a hollowed-out hill in the middle of nowhere!

FML.

Anyway, things are going terrible. They just put a gun in my hand and told me to line up, 'cause some big shaggy UGH they call a "muffalo" was going nuts and trying to kill the little one who keeps glaring daggers at my head, right? And now an escape pod landed.

Turns out it's some... Ugh, I've never seen such a disgusting parody of a person before: no breasts, no curves, and oh my god what between its legs?!

The ones who didn't come from our planet tell me that's called a "man" and is perfectly normal. The older lovegood told me to slip out, shoot it in the head and shove it in a hole in the ground before anyone noticed. That seems cruel, but... Yeah, no way I'm living near that thing. That Maldonado mentioned what those... Things do with those things on their hips, like, NOPE!

So I went out there and did it. It took me a while, but thinking about what Maldonado said... Gave me the shivers, so I did it. I fucking did it! HAH! WHO'S THE WOMAN! I am!

I didn't want to touch him, so I dug the hole kind of like, around him. That worked. But I'm totes like, not hauling back that pistol. Make one of the other girls do it.

Day 33, Hour 2
Like, FML. They say a blight destroyed our crops.

That's the epic suck. Oh well, not my problem, the herb girls will deal with it. Me and Bright are just chilling in the cafeteria, with these workbenches, talking. She's such a cute girl, I wanna do her so bad.


Day 34, Hour 6
FUUUUUCK!

Some of those tribesfucks have shown up to kill us or what-ever.

....

There's only two of them, and they're somewhere we can easily sneak up on them. Erkki is advocating a first strike. Off we go!

...

They had stones. Literally, handfulls of fucking stones. Erkki said we should beat the daylights out of them and try to take them alive, but, uh...

That didn't quite work out so hot. We beat them to death in the confusion. The Lovegoods stayed behind to dig holes and shovel them, 'cause, EW!

Day 34, Hour 20

Well, that unpleasantness is dealt with. We decided to smooth out the grow room floor, both to make it faster and get some practice at doing it. There was talk of digging into the mountain to the west for future expansions. Lots of talk, not enough metal to back it up. I mean, we mined some. But we need more.

[ShadowDragon8685]

Day 35, Hour 13
From the diary of Laura Lovegood

The nob and the pop icon came through. Now we've rediscovered the ancient, long-lost art... Of stonemasonry. Now we can turn stone debris into stone bricks, which we can use to build stone buildings! Yay? Yay!


We need more food, though, and it was suggested we should probably start trading. With who, I dunno. Who is there out here to trade with? But Erkki said that if we build a beacon, they will come.

Day 37, Hour 13

Shit!

Some more of those "The Soldier Group" asstards are back! They landed from drop pods and are attacking immediately!

Fuck, fuck, fuck!

...

Okay, that went... Well.

There were only three of them, and they only had pistols. We didn't manage to capture any of them alive, but we shot two of them, ran the third off, and captured some guns.


Day 37, Hour 15
Min decided to call Cab Driver's Hill and see what they wanted. There isn't much we can do, I guess, but they seem to want some silver.

Hell, the stuff's literally just laying around. We're gonna haul it to a centralized location, see what's what.

Day 40, Hour 10
Still getting the hang of this, trying to figure out this silly trade mechanism. But yay, a bunch of cargo pods full of strawberries fell pretty much on our rooftops!

Day 42, Hour 9
I hate to say this, but things are... Well, going well.

We need more metal, of course, but we've got food production more or less sorted, we're starting to think about trade and more rooms. We NEED more rooms!

In other news, some lady just showed up. She says she's 26 and she looks it... She says that folks call her Pickle; she was a civil servant, and before that a child scout; and, of all things, a celebrity fan, so she's gushing over Min.

Yay.

I built her a bed right next to Min's. Hopefully they can get it on or whatever.

Day 43, Hour 12
Fucking wonderful. A boomrat went psycho and attacked my little sister. We all ran out to kill it, and... Well, I shot Lovey. She's okay, but man, she is NOT happy! And of course, now there's a grass-fire, and we get to see just how fireproof our concrete really is.


Day 46, Hour 10
And... That's it.

Our little colony knows everything there is to know.[/sarcasm]

More seriously, Bright and Min say they've figured out everything they can figure out, so... Well, yay, they get to ponce around eating each other out, I guess. We really, really need to get individual bedrooms, but, it seems everybody's more or less in good spirits about the current arrangement. I guess keeping everybody close-by has its advantages.

Anyway, it seems to be time to start building stone houses, so we're gonna set up a stonemasonry workshop, I guess.

Day 50, Hour 0
Well, that was an all-new multimedia experience. A bunch of muffalo just up and decided to trample our faces in. We survived, thankfully, though I think we managed to catch some friendly fire (WTF HOW DO YOU MISTAKE A HUMAN FOR A MUFFALO?!)

The weird thing is, they were from two different herds. How peculiar.

Anyway, we have the stonemasonry hut up and are carving stone blocks. Min will actually do this work, to my surprise! I guess it appeals to the artiste in her.

I guess we're not going to be wanting for muffalo meat. We're going to go mining for more metal, because we're critically low.

Day 52, Hour 0
Fantastically fucking frightening dry thunderstorm going on, and we just detected a downed escape pod.

I went out and looked myself - it was a woman, so I brought her in. Her name is Sheng, and evidently she's an Empath. Evidently she's quite famous, and totally unable to harm others... Lovely.

In other news, Min traded our overstock of potatoes for some wood, from a farming company.

Day 54, Hour 2
Another escape pod. This one landed practically on our damn doorstep. Her name is Roslyn, though she goes by 'Celia'. Dunno why.

Day 57, Hour 11
We're built a tree farm. There are suggestions that the shape of it isn't ideal, and that we could do better by making a little outcrop in the middle with a sunlamp and what-not. But yay, tree farm!

[vagineer1]

This is the second story I've seen with this plotline: 3 women programmed to hate men end up on a Rimworld, and some of them are horny. I'm not saying it is bad but why do the women have to hate men? It makes no sense?

[ShadowDragon8685]

Bit of a challenge, in that it means off-handedly rejecting statistically 50% of any potential colonists I get thrown at me. Also a bit of author appeal, I won't lie.

Plus, it offers up a convenient excuse if I decide to generate some intra-colonist conflict.

[StorymasterQ]

This is the second story I've seen with this plotline: 3 women programmed to hate men end up on a Rimworld, and some of them are horny. I'm not saying it is bad but why do the women have to hate men? It makes no sense?

Day 31, Hour 15
The Diary of Min
...
The ones who didn't come from our planet tell me that's called a "man" and is perfectly normal.
...

Apparently they come from a Vandread-like female-only planet. Also, I try not to draw conclusions, but vagineer1 sounds like a username of a person from said planet.

[vagineer1]

I got my name from a facial bug the TF2 engineer has if you alter his face in Garry's mod.

[StorymasterQ]

I got my name from a facial bug the TF2 engineer has if you alter his face in Garry's mod.

His FACE is NSFW Anyway, continue.

[vagineer1]

I got my name from a facial bug the TF2 engineer has if you alter his face in Garry's mod.

His FACE is NSFW Anyway, continue.

Technically his face isn't anything, it is just the result of a facial glitch that HAPPENS to vaguely resemble a women's bodypart.

[Ender]

love that you finally decided to write another story, keep it up, of course whenever you have time!