<Rimworld: The AI Persona>
You taste blood and metal in your dream
You wake up to the abyss, the so-called sky
I'll take you home, let me take you home
You suppress a scream against the endless lie
------
Just writing about the AI persona core. It's hard to believe the thing wants to kill you with 20+ mechanoids at first, then suddenly willing to guide you home as soon as you put it into your ship...
...Urm. Probably shouldn't be writing English poems though, it's not even my mother tongue... I have no way to know whether it's good, or whether it's even a poem at all. It probably needs tons of things more than just rhyme and ideas. So, if anyone can tell me whether this is good as a "poem" or not at all, I'd really appreciate it! :D Otherwise, just read for fun. :D
Most English poetry doesn't rhyme anyway and just focuses on layers of metaphor, so you're spot on as far as that goes. And it does rhyme. :)
Crash down on rim world
Everything clamors for death
Die, flee, or conqueror
~A RimWorld Haiku
Quote from: milon on May 16, 2016, 07:30:07 AM
Most English poetry doesn't rhyme anyway and just focuses on layers of metaphor, so you're spot on as far as that goes. And it does rhyme. :)
Oh thanks! :D That's good to know, and I can focus more on the ideas part...
Is that 俳句(haiku) that I see? Now THAT is what actually requires a lot of rules! ;D
<Rimworld: Ice Sheet>
Freeze my heart upon the plateau
A prison of crystal under the sun
Come watch the sunset with me
Come watch the downfall with me
And time will bleed away as we live
And days will fade away as we wake
A beautiful mirror, a lake of illusions
My aqua city embraces you and me
----
Life on ice sheet! :D (And "aqua city" is just talking about plasteel colour...)
Fallen from the sky, we were taken here to live and die.
Three to begin, a struggle to come.
Whether by starvation, disease, or lead, we will succumb.
Nevermind here comes some maddened squirrels.
Quote from: Reddeath96 on May 16, 2016, 11:23:34 AM
Fallen from the sky, we were taken here to live and die.
Three to begin, a struggle to come.
Whether by starvation, disease, or lead, we will succumb.
Nevermind here comes some maddened squirrels.
Lol! Of course it has to end with squirrels ;D
Yeah, I kind of like haiku. It's fun. And sometimes the mood strikes. ;D
TARGET ACQUIRED.
HOSTILE HUMAN DETECTED...
... ELIMINATED.
SCANNING FOR TARGETS...
... HEAT SIGNATURE DETECTED.
MOVE TO OPTICS RANGE.
*thump* *bang* *thump-thump* *bang*
MINOR DAMAGE DETECTED.
TARGET ACQUIRED.
*thump, thump, bang, thump, bang*
MULTIPLE HOSTILES PRESENT.
KILL THEM. KILL THEM ALL.
*Thump! Thump! Ratta-Bump!*
HOSTILE TARGETS ARE FAST.
MINIGUN ENGAGE.
*Thumpity, bang-BOOM!*
DR1VE TR4IN C0MPROMIZ3D. K1LL T#3M!
K1LL 4LL - *Bang bang BOOM!*
*Chitter chitter chirp?* :o
"Oh God no!! The mechs!! We're doomed!"
"Run for your lives!! RUN!!!"
*SQUEE chitter chitter!* ;D
"Augh! The pain!" *SNAP* *THUD* ( silence )
*Chitter chirp chitter?* :'(
*SQUEE! SQUEE! CHITTER-CHIRP!* 8)
Everyone is dead or gone.
Play another game?
~Furry beasts of fury
Working with words isn't my thing, but here's my try:
Muffalo is white
It's far away,
That furry beast.
I'll shoot it dead.
Some day.
Quote from: milon on May 16, 2016, 01:45:18 PM
Yeah, I kind of like haiku. It's fun. And sometimes the mood strikes. ;D
Writing haiku is probably gonna kill me... I checked the rules carefully and realised it probably doesn't go well with my limited vocabulary. :D (Might do better if I write in Chinese but then again I won't be able to share it here. ;D)
Btw, that's a really nice one about mechanoids... I do wonder sometimes though; do mechs think about killing people? Or are they just doing some "cleaning" job which feels very neutral to them, without even a tiny bit of "killing" thoughts?
Quote from: Element4ry on May 18, 2016, 11:59:37 AM
Working with words isn't my thing, but here's my try:
Muffalo is white
It's far away,
That furry beast.
I'll shoot it dead.
Some day.
That feel when you see sth on the edge of the map and just say to yourself "Oh forget it" ;D
I just came up with a good one!
----
<Rimworld: Green Mist>
The sky green like the meadow
The air sweet like the grass
You walk and open the window
The earth as dead as space
They say dead people rise to the sky
They say souls will become stars
Now among thousands of stars you lie
Wondering why gravity betrayed you
----
This is about how a dying person seeing sky as the grassland and earth as the dead sky! :D And of course a lot of people are already dead around him (probably already bones too), and that's the "thousands of stars" thing ;D
Raider bleeding out
No room in the prison cell
The pigs feast tonight
My bill completed!
the quality is awful
sell it for silver
A wanderer joins!
No pants but he brought a shiv
Weird priorities
This is fun ;D
I ;D this thread so much!! These are great!
The only haiku rule I know is that is has to be 5-7-5 syllables. There's probably others that I'm trampling all over, but oh well. ;)
See happy travelers
Happy starship crash and burn
All are dead. But three.
Three look for shelter
They find an intact building
Look in - run away!
Find cute warg puppies
See them play, hear them barking
Find angry mother
Three unhappy pawns
They are hurt, they are tired
Start a social fight
Quote from: milon on May 24, 2016, 08:14:20 AM
The only haiku rule I know is that is has to be 5-7-5 syllables. There's probably others that I'm trampling all over, but oh well. ;)
As I understand it, haiku is supposed to convey two different themes with a specific word in the haiku separating them - this is why haiku (in western languages) tend to work well if you include a pun or play on words of some sort - you can't really follow the strict rules of haiku because they only make sense in japanese, but you can attempt to translate the feeling of "cutting" through wordplay. That's my interpretation anyway.
I refuse to clean
haul? I could not possibly
I am too noble
Interesting. I usually try to make the last line a surprise or a sudden change in perspective, which is similar I think.
Also, nice haiku!
There once was a man from the Rim.
He married a guy called Jim.
It caused quite a stir
That a man would prefer
A guy over Minyoung Kim.
Quote from: Element4ry on May 18, 2016, 11:59:37 AM
Working with words isn't my thing, but here's my try:
Muffalo is white
It's far away,
That furry beast.
I'll shoot it dead.
Some day.
It look like Black Bart's poems !