Corrupt-A-Wish

[catter]

Granted, you now walk on water whenever you wish. Your new name is also shark bait because whenever you do walk on water, the water under you makes a small amount of blood in which sharks can smell from a mile away. Hope you don't ever go out in the ocean!

I wish that whenever a shark attacks Kegereneku, I could throw a spear very perniciously into the shark's heart before eating Kegereneku.

[Kegereneku]

(you really need to work on granting a wish without adding unrelated stuff catter)

Wish granted, whatever you were doing, no matter where you were and no matter what you wish for. You are systematically transported at the same place Kegereneku is being attacked by sharks, with a spear appearing in your hand, and the occasion to throw a spear in a sharks heart.
As a result, you were watching TV on a comfy couch when you are suddenly transported above water with a spear, you only have 2 seconds to do the throwing and kill the shark before falling into said water full of blood and attracting sharks (Kegereneku don't have to be near a shores or boat because he can WALK ON WATER)
You spend the rest of your life wishing Kegereneku never go shark walking in the middle of the night (on island the other side of the planet in daylight)


I wish I could split the sea like Moses supposedly did but for real.

[gipothegip]

Granted, but the first time you try it, you really mess up and end up causing catastrophic floods. You also bring your phone, thinking you'd be dry, but since you don't know what you're doing, you drench yourself and destroy your phone.

I wish I had noticed this thread was back earlier.

[catter]

Granted, you now have been transported back in time and saw this thread was back. However, you teleported into yourself and are now a walking crack in time and space. With that, you go insane of not only seeing into the space-time continuum, but also of hearing many voices of many other dimensions even if nobody is there in your dimension.

I wish that unrelated stuff could be enjoyed, and even more so when it causes a good corruption.

[NeverPire]

Granted, unrelated stuff is now enjoyed, so it becomes a part of the corruption, so it's now related. Due to this specific paradox, the space-time fabric breaks and a wormhole happens which drives you in a paradoxical world where you live happy and have many children but no more access to this thread.

That was dedicated to you, catter.

I wish someone explains me the difference between a good and a bad corruption.

[AllenWL]

Wish granted, however, the person explains the difference between what they think is a good and bad corruption, which basically boils down into 'if I like it, it's a good corruption' which greatly confuses you, but any attempts to ask for a better explanation causes much shouting and insults.

You leave even more confused then before you made the wish. On the bright side, you now know way more insults then you've even imaged could exist.

I wish I had some pie.

[gipothegip]

Granted. It's a literal mud pie crafted by a kid via mixing some dirt and stagnant pool water into a bowl. Bon appetit.

I wish Rob Dyke still did comedy videos, more specificially "Why Would You Put That on the Internet?".

[ruddthree]

Granted, but Rob reacts to nothing but corny dad jokes. Unless you're into that...

I wish I was a pie.

[Listen1]

BILLY NOOOOOOOOOOO!

I wish that my company would run itself but had to pay me $120.000 a year without me doing squat

[ruddthree]

Granted, but all that money turns out to be counterfeit.

I wish alpha 18 was out tomorrow (heck, it might be for all we know...).

[Kegereneku]

Wish granted, some nefarious hacker took control of Tynan computer and will force release tomorrow what Tynan was working on as alpha 0.18
Because it will be forced unfinished, it will be extremely buggy with critical features don't interact with each other correctly.


I wish magical phenomena made packages and mail arrive at their destination mere second after they were sent, despite following the normal delivery process.
So I can receive that stuff I ordered on ebay faster.

[{insert_name_here}]

Wish granted. Ebay can now use teleporters to transport their packages in seconds. However the teleportation software that ebay uses is really unreliable and buggy. Some things people order end up on the roof, and others end up in other, even more inconvenient spots. Good luck trying to use that new set of headphones after they appear in a wet, dirty gutter near your house...

[NeverPire]

To avoid to let this thread dying, I will make a wish.

I wish to know the A18 release date.

[ruddthree]

Granted, but you find that it will release in 10 years.

I wish for a pie-flavored pie. What could go wrong?

[Kegereneku]

Wish granted, you are given a pie that when eaten make you taste the CONCEPT of a pie. What could go wrong is that while your organism is capable of digesting say a strawberry-pie fine, digesting a CONCEPT is a whole other deal, in fact, because you are what you eat, you slowly start morphing into the CONCEPTUAL RESULT of a digested pie.
Fully describing what it look like would require to interact with another plane of existence and would make everyone insane from the revelation, so let's just say that people start treating you as if you were just the concept of a person.

I wish I could read the Necronomicon without any problem or loss of sanity.