New story time! - The Legendary Revengers

[Sola]

Cassandra Extreme, Permadeath

Once this one's done, I'll be drawing a comic of the highlight reel, making it more digestible than your typical wall-of-text story.

Warning: Despite my equatorial temperate forest start, I will probably lose, as I will not use many tricks that make the game easier (diagonal melee bug, prepping poison ships with 9001 turrets, trapping monsters in boxes of hot/cold,  bunkers that take advantage of the AI).  So don't expect a fairytale ending.

Alexi - Naval Scientist : Burning passion in shooting (2) and science (15).  She's also gonna be doing the gardening (7) and doctoring (7).

Sparkles - Jeweler : Burning passion in art (13) and crafting (14), and interested in constructtion (10).  Everything she does is gonna have a quality attached to it, and it'll (hopefully) be good.

Jay - Low wage worker : Burning passion in mining (3), and interested in cooking (7) social (5) and shooting (1).

They land with an arctic fox named Carnation.  That's adorable.

A respectable team.  Just need to keep the riff-raff out of our burgeoning utopia.

--
Day 1: We'll begin by hanging a lantern on one of the biggest pet peeves I have in this game.  "Incapable of doing things you don't like doing.  ...but you'll do it if it pertains to your job because reasons."  In this case, plant cutting.


3 good beds and a normal bed.  Sparkles has earned a gold star!

And they waste no time.  "Hey babe.  We might never see civilization ever again.  Do you really want to die a virgin on this desolate rock?" or maybe, "It's gonna be really cold at night.  We should make love to keep warm!"  In any case, Jay's got the moves.


Alexi doesn't care that she's stranded and lucky to be alive.  She needs both bionic implants and an impressive bedroom, and she wants them NOW!

Day 3: A pop idol pirate comes to visit.  Everyone's gotta be special, don't they?

Day 4: You know things aren't too bad if people are still hung up on things like names.  The group is "The Legendary Revengers", from Camp Wanacupawata.

A local hare has decided he didn't like the name, and went berserk.  Alexi and Jay both go out to squish it, but get scratched up really bad.  Sparkles tends to Alexi's wounds and tries to go to bed.  "Wait...  I should probably put some band-aids on my boyfriend's wounds, too, shouldn't I?"  I have to manually force her to tend to Jay before she goes to sleep.

Day 5: We get a call from Sadako Galloway asking for help.  "Are you 'incapable' of hauling?  Do you like setting fires in the middle of the night?  Are you prone to violent outbursts?"  She does not answer the questions, instead screaming, "PIRATES!  FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HELP!"  We agree to help her.
...And now we know why she didn't answer the questions before we decided how to respond.



A good shooter and a good miner?  I suppose I can overlook the rest of what normally makes a joining wanderer equivalent to bear food.  Welcome to the team!

We knock out her pursuer, but he's got a chemical fascination and also refuses to do plebian labor.  We let Sadako deliver the killing blow.  That should be cathartic!

Day 6: A RAID!  from.. a single naked dude with a shiv.  Can we really call this a raid?  We knock him out, and he's a jealous and incapable of many things.  Worm food!

A wild boar, impressed by our combat prowess, tames itself and asks to join the party.  What could possibly go wrong here?

Day 7:  Don Juan all up in this joint.  6 days after they begin dating, Jay proposes to Sparkles.  It must be true love!  Alexi, however, is not happy about this.  She keeps getting rebuffed by Jay.  I wonder how she'll handle the wedding?

A wild Thrumbo appears!  Not touching that with a ten foot pole.  I just hope it doesn't eat my trees.

Day 11: "But I waaaaant it!  I want it I want it I want it!"


Day 12: Heat wave begins.  Sparkles is busy enough tiling the floor that I don't want to change it up to add A/C units to the main hall just yet.

Day 13:  Jay, the Skilled Professional chef, gave himself food poisoning.  Rim-OSHA would have a field day if they walked into this kitchen.


Day 16: A raid.  five guys with clubs.  One gets knocked out, the rest die.  Aaaand... he's incapable of hauling and jealous.  FLAWLESS VICTORY!  FINISH HIM!

Day 19: Alexi has another mental break.  Again, the final straw was "lacking an impressive bedroom".  This time, it was mostly done, too.

Alexi: "I really need that nice bedroom."
Sparkles: "I'm working on it."
Alexi: "I need it NOW!
Sparkles: "Seriously.  There's only four of us.  Relax.
Alexi: "NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW!"
Sparkles: "It's almost done.  The bed, table, and chair are in the warehouse, and we just need to smooth out the floor in your room and.."
Alexi: "THAT'S IT!  SCREW EVERYTHING!"

[Sola]

Day 20:  A combat supplier appears!  I give 'em the clubs dropped by the tribals and trade them for some mortar shells.

Day 23:  A raid, 7 guys drop in in drop pods.  5 of them with assorted guns.  In order to win this, I have to lure them into my base and fight from natural cover, and from around building corners.  During this time, a hare goes mad and helps by attacking the raiders.  The raiders shoot each other trying to hit the hare.  It was neat.
They light half the crops on fire and Sparkles loses a thumb.  Rain comes immediately afterwards to put out the fire.

Day 24: Still recovering from the injuries of the last adventure, a psychic drone hits all the girls in the colony.  Here's hoping Alexi likes her room enough to ignore that.

Jay contract Malaria.  Exciting!

Day 25: Jay and Sadako get the flu.  Jay is not having a good time.

Day 26: A wandering girl named Roslyn joins.  She must have heard how much fun we were having and couldn't resist joining up.



A pyromaniac.  That's nice.

Day 29: Now Sparkles has the flu.  This run is turning into "Damage Control: The Game"

Day 30: A dry thunderstorm scorches the earth.  Fortunately, we've got stone walls and floors to prevent it from infecting the base.

Day 33: Ten tribals.  Time for Roslyn to do her job!

...What.  Alexi immediately eats a pila to the head behind sandbags and walls.  That's fine.  It happens.  Shot two down before they get close enough to do any damage.  Roslyn's rockin' that armor and tanking nicely.  ...Then Jay gets stabbed to death and everyone dies.

Game Over!  The least legendary run I've ever had

[Sola]

First installment.

[Sola]

Contrary to what I've done this far, Sparkles is actually my favorite colonist to get in this game.

[rambo]

Noice story mate

[Sola]

Yeah.  TWO people got smacked around by a single rabbit.  At least self-tend is a thing now, for the rich explorer scenario.

[EnricoDandolo]

That comic is really nice.
Its got a charming feel to it, and the simple art style makes me really appreciate it.
And as Alexi would say
"I want it now!"
(refering to more comics plz.)