The Drunkard's Tavern.

[catter]

Here, have a nice cool drink of alcohol. Rubbing alcohol...

[kubolek01]

Alcohol... only with some additional ammonia, you weak foolish cat-like.

[harpo99999]

alzo sloowz freeeezzzing, NEED MOOOORR ANTIFREEZE

[catter]

Have a drink of scalding hot, super pure alcohol.

[Bulltank]

Yellow! /wave

[catter]

._.

I am now unsure whether I'm drunk or insane...

Maybe both.



Where did all the peoples go? Did they take all the booze? Did they leave me to sober up? Why me? Why me all the time? What did I do? How could this happen to me? I made my mistakes. I got nowhere to run. Life goes on, and this is how it ends. Where did I go wrong? Who is even reading this? Is there a point to all this? How could you still be reading this? Don't you have a home to go to? Shouldn't your wife/mother know where you are? Why don't you go home to your wife/mother? Does she love you? Are you a homosexual? Do you have a husband instead of a wife? Are you a woman? Are you real? Do you have a friend? Do you have a life? Do you have a home? Could you spare me some change? Can you give me all your possessions? Do you eat beans? Do you like George Whent? Do You like eating beans? Do you like George Whent movies? Do you eat beans while watching a George Whent movie? Would you like to see George Whent eating beans? Would you like to see a George Whent movie about beans? Are you lonely? What kind of human are you? What is wrong with living in the slums? Why couldn't you talk to somebody else? Could you spare some change for gas? I need to get myself away from this place. Did somebody once tell you, the world was going to roll you 'cause you ain't the sharpest tool in the shed? So what's wrong with taking the backstreets? Did you go for the moon? Are you even caring whether I am a person or cat? Do you ever think this is one giant joke for a questionnaire? What is the point to life? When we do so much, will it matter as much in the future? Is there an afterlife? What does it feel like to not exist? Have you ever heard a song that made you sing along? Have you ever experienced death? Is there a new reason why you are reading this question? Is your inbox smaller than your breadbox? Are you a box? Do you easily hide as a box? When hiding as a box and you are spotted, do you make box noises to make them think you are only a box? Do you cry when killing an annoying spider? Have you been a bot this whole time? Do you like old shows or new ones?


WELL???

[harpo99999]

ZOO MAYNY QUESTION MARKS for a catt
each question NEEDS to be a SEPERATE LINE!!!!(or post)

instruction for thread
1 GEYT VATT
2 FILL VATT with BOOZE
3 GEYT second and third ,fourth & fifth LARGER VATTS
4 fill  new VATTS with STRONGER BOOZE
5 DRUNK FIRST VATT, SUPPLY other VATTS to RESEDINTS sipping
6 repeat from step 1

[catter]

Hey, man... The question wall was just a prank bro! It just a prank!! Leave me alone!!!

Seriously though, why would you order chaos when it will just not make sense anyways... I was a philosophy drunkard when posting that. I then sobered up halfway through and realized it was all a joke and continued the post. I mean, it's not like I actually meant all that stuff. It also will not lead to a word wall that will continue on for another 36 lines. I mean, that would be crazy right? Why would I do a thing like that? It's so stupid... Unless you make it a running gag, in which case you can go garf narble zous with marbles in your mouth! Wait, was that a Weird Al reference? It could have been, or something else... Who knows?! I don't, and that is what makes it a long process of bickering over nothing. Of course who cares, nobody will really read this garbage writing anyways so why should I even bother to write anything wholesome? ... I KNOW! Because somebody might get a kick out of this, or they might kick me. Either way, I'm teaching people not to get cats who can type to become drunk. It ends with horrendous word walls that cause brain cancer that might cause death. Death is bad, you know! Don't do lots of drugs, some drugs are fine, but not all of them... Also don't do rugs since shag is not good for your lungs to breath in and wool is too expensive. Don't do Dugs either since Dug is not for smoking. You can however do "durs" since some people are stupid and require to be spoken to in their native language. For example,"dur dur dur" means "I don't know" in moron. Anyways... How is your day? Is it good or bad? Mine was weird since I had to find an answer to every question I made yesterday. It goes as follows: Nowhere. Yes. Yes. Because you. Because you have bad luck. Nothing. Because. You didn't. Me. Yes. Because I am you. No. No. Because I have neither. No. No. No. No. Yes. No. No. No. No. No. Yes. No. No. No. No. No. No. Yes. The cat kind. Poverty. I have no one else. Yup, what a concept; I could use a little fuel myself and we could all use a little change. Yup, she was looking kinda' dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape of an "L" on her forehead. You never know if you don't go; you never shine if you don't glow. No, I hit a star. Yes. Yes. Good question. Not really. I think so. I don't know. Yes. No. No. No. No. Sometimes. Yes. No. No. Both. ... Now that we are done with that, I don't care what happens next because this a giant word wall and it needs to become 36 lines long or I will have broken my promise. Yes, it will become 36 lines long don't worry. I will think of some way to extend this post. "How" you ask? By doing some stupid stuff and saying so much you will give up trying to read this. Don't believe me? If you stopped reading beyond this point, you only stopped a few lines ahead of the half-way mark. That would be sad if you did that since this is supposedly 36 lines long and you didn't have the guts to read that much. Is that mean or am I just a stupid drunkard again who rambles on and on and on and on for so long that you want to stop? If option one, stop reading. If option two, keep reading you may find a funny comment in here somewhere. "And now a message from our providers: Do you like fishing? Do you like milk? Well now you can get whale milk for only $999999.99!!! On sale at your local Toys R Us! *Note: Whale milk is a trademark of Dumb Enterprises and cannot be traded or used by anyone over the age of 18. Whale milk has actually no substance to it since it doesn't exist. Any lawsuit able to be made against Dumb Enterprises is waived when purchasing whale milk. Not every price is the same. See your local store for details." ... Was that the best ad you have seen or what? You can get almost a million dollars and not get a lawsuit for it! Isn't that cool? How can you get away with that without sending a million dollars to the government? This is going to hit the markets and tank the economy, bringing up the worth of the dollar! Money will become silver in the 5000s because of this! Oh the humanity! What a truck of whale milk! Why can't I think of something more creative to say? You can do better than read only half-way through the word wall. Please continue on since you are only 5 lines away from reaching the end. To think I could find some way to reach my goal of 36 lines of words and sentences that don't really mean much. Kind of like bureaucratic company figureheads giving a speech or a company mission statement. It is words that mean nothing. As a reward for being told this, you get to watch a video about useless words made by 70s hippies. Here it is: Weird Al's "Mission Statement" However, that will be the only reward you get since you never really read through it all. You never read all 36 lines of pure mind-numbing rambling. You can't stop wondering though why I did this, don't you? BECAUSE YOU WON'T READ IT! THAT IS THE JOKE! If you did read it all however, you will get a medal of bravery at the end. Since you are near that, you...... YOU WIN!!!!!!! Come and get your prize for making it through 36 lines of crud!



\ /
o  <------- Tiny bravery medal



Good job. Now GO HOME you bum! Only people with lots of time and no job can read through that! Go get a job and loose all your free time to earn money!

Thank you for reading another "Drunken Tip"!

[harpo99999]

BUT it is CATS that catch the cancers (often in the mouth), then they leave a whole in the house that they used to occupy.

NOTICE TO CATS
CANCERS ARE NOT A DESIRABLE PREY
DO NOT CATCH CANCERS AS THEY WILL KILL YOU

end of notice to cats
now have you heard of milk cow, what about milk goat, then perhaps milk sheep, then there might also be a milk dog, milk cat, milk mouse, milk kangaroo, (note how all of those are mammals), and as dolphins, orcas, and the whales are also mammals, so ther also should be dolphin milk, orca milk AND blue whale milk

and yes I IS drunking , have TOOOOOOOOO Much time , am self employed (neither have an employer nor  unemployment 'benifits' nor enough money

[catter]

For your information, whale milk is real. BUt iT Can"t TrAnsPOte gOOd!!11!1

Maybe we can sell beer and call it "Old barley" or sell vodka and call it "Organic rotten potatoes". Who knows...

Got any "Foot-squashed grapes" or "Fermented corn" around here?

[harpo99999]

at least it would be 'truth in advertising' unlike all other advertising and branding efforts

[iqtakadabra]

why did the IT dork have to ban everything

[catter]

Who? I'm high on catnip right now so who is this IT guy you speak of? I don't know anyone of that name... Why did I have to play with a catnip toy after drinking booze?

[scorlew]

So this is where conversations go to die, eh?

[harpo99999]

nah, ut is whear dey go to gut drunks