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[brinxter]

I was playing with Randy Random, on a ludicrous size map, and was at around year 3 or 4, and having survived some really weird shit.

So, in come this group of, i'm guessing, 60-70 pawns, from a friendly faction, all with serious weapons (i am using the weapons mod), they walk into my base, and loiter in the middle of it.
Then the other faction, tribals, decides to come say hi as well, and come with 150-200 of them (my pc is pretty beastly)
Turns out, they hate each others guts (you've guessed right!)

Since i can't do anything about it, i withdraw my peeps into my underground base (was in the middle of relocating when they arrived) they wreaked havoc on my base, and themselves, then, right as it was ending, and i was tending to the fires and bodies everywhere, one of my primary 3 colonists, turns to the pirate faction, i capture her, and in comes the cavalry, 15 guys, all in power armor, and mini guns, in drop pods, in the middle of the battlefield, they wipe/incapacitate  my colonists, and decide to capture everyone they can, running off with their turncoat, and my remaining two colonists.

It was epic!     

[Lost Cause]

More 'Funny' allies moments...
Oh yes... very funny...
I got raided. You know a standard little rush. They have tried it before and it has never worked on this colony. I got the notice I had visitors at the same time which I was happy about because they should soften each other up a bit or so I thought. The two groups met right outside my front door and they didn't shoot at each other... Not one shot... They were blooming friends with each other!

I can only imagine the conversation must have gone something to the tune of
Visitor Leader: Oh hey it's the Rock Tribe!
Raider Leader: Hello there Shanty Town people! what brings you here?
Visitor Leader: We are just visiting, going to eat all their food, shoot up the place, probably put a few locals in hospital. How about you?
Raider Leader: Ohh, you know, just going to murder half of them, kidnap the survivors, maybe abandon a few crippled and alone to die horribly.
Visitor Leader: Well in that case After You.
Raider Leader: Ohh no. After you. I insist.

They all poured in, the visitors move in around my defensive positions while the raiders attacked my turrets. Then the visitors turned on me, probably sparked off by an exploding turret or a stray bullet and since they had moved in behind my peoples defensive line they gunned down half my colony in their first round of fire before finishing off my entire colony with absolutely no way for me to stop it.
Every single colonist died.
Every single blasted one.
God dame them all.
How many colonies do I have to lose to my allies?

[attachment deleted by admin: too old]

[Shinzy]

I can only imagine the conversation must have gone something to the tune of
Visitor Leader: Oh hey it's the Rock Tribe!
Raider Leader: Hello there Shanty Town people! what brings you here?
Visitor Leader: We are just visiting, going to eat all their food, shoot up the place, probably put a few locals in hospital. How about you?
Raider Leader: Ohh, you know, just going to murder half of them, kidnap the survivors, maybe abandon a few crippled and alone to die horribly.
Visitor Leader: Well in that case After You.
Raider Leader: Ohh no. After you. I insist.

haha this is amazing =P
Ohh I really wish you could play as a "Visitor faction"
your goal would be just send your guys for a visit and attempt to have them cause as much damage as possible in as "innocent" way as possible
"Oh haallooo dear neeeighbooors! Howyoubeeeeennn? heeere wee come agaaain!"

[BassMonroe]

The day a Boomrat snuck its way into my battery room, and exploded after 2 day of being stuck there.
Put my colony in total darkness for 3 days.

[milon]

How many colonies do I have to lose to my allies?

One way to avoid that is to just make them all hostile.  At the start of the game (when visitor groups are small), arrest the best-looking one of the bunch.  Free colonist!

The day a Boomrat snuck its way into my battery room, and exploded after 2 day of being stuck there.
Put my colony in total darkness for 3 days.

LOL, oops! 
A pet is fine - just make sure to feed it if it's a boomrat!
I had a pet squirrel once.  One of my colonists kept him in his room, and delivered food to it every day.  And then one day it went mad and tried to bite the hand that fed it.  That didn't work out well for the squirrel. 

[UrbanBourbon]

I had a pet squirrel once.  One of my colonists kept him in his room, and delivered food to it every day.  And then one day it went mad and tried to bite the hand that fed it.  That didn't work out well for the squirrel. 

Knowing RimWorld, the squirrel bit the hand off and choked to death while the former owner of the hand bled to death. The loss of the colonist and the sight of his corpse set off a mental break spiral and everyone either went berserk or quit, ending the colony. Sound about right?

[Dr. Z]

I think you get the idea.

[muffins]

Boomrats. Psychic event. Early game. Just four colonists, one incapable of violence. Weapons, two sniper rifles and one uzi. Big mob of boomrats break down the door. Snipers miss. Boomrats mob colonist with uzi. She doesn't miss. Explosions, explosions everywhere. Boomrats dead. All colonists on fire and running around screaming "IT BURNS! IT BURNS!!".

Everyone stayed in the medical room that day, taking turns being the doctor.

[UrbanBourbon]

I got fed up with visitor groups so I walled off my base. For some reason, and this baffles me a bit, they now seem to gather up in the same spot outside my colony walls, although there have been exceptions. My best guess now is that the map geography and my colony layout somehow direct the majority of the groups to hang out in that one spot. Soon one of the groups starts to break down mentally due to hunger, fatigue and ugly environment. A tribal goes berserk and dies there quickly in the hands of his friends. So now I have my first corpse there to drop the mood even further. Eventually whole groups succumb to in-fighting and mostly die in that one small area. The whole spot is now littered with corpses. All visitor groups that go hang out there break down in a record time, ending up either fighting or wandering in daze in the vicinity. And why does all this violence and death happen? Because I set up a wall. Am I the 60's East Germany or Israel?

After stumbling on this discovery, I'm now thinking of doing further research to refine this process of fully automated corpse and weapon production. My capitalist senses are tingling and whispering there is great  profit in this, with minimal risk. What started out as a nuisance, ended up as a boost to income and defense, even if unintentionally. I have to find further means to promote disharmony and violence outside.

I've learned that certain individuals are resistant to psychic droning. I'm theorizing that if one were to gather a whole group of these individuals, and simply wait for the eventual arrival of an Ancient Ship, one could create an environment in which madness ensues quickly to everyone but your own people. Preferrably these people would also possess optimistic views towards life, or be otherwise shielded against hardship in general. Even if a rare outsider were to stay sane amidst the heavy background droning, filth, darkness, corpses, hunger and fatigue, that just means one would have another candidate for his or her colony.

This is how religions and cults begin.

...Bow before me.
(and please someone pick up the paper that I dropped. I have a bad back. Sigh.)

[Shinzy]

I got fed up with visitor groups so I walled off my base. For some reason, and this baffles me a bit, they now seem to gather up in the same spot outside my colony walls, although there have been exceptions. My best guess now is that the map geography and my colony layout somehow direct the majority of the groups to hang out in that one spot. Soon one of the groups starts to break down mentally due to hunger, fatigue and ugly environment. A tribal goes berserk and dies there quickly in the hands of his friends. So now I have my first corpse there to drop the mood even further. Eventually whole groups succumb to in-fighting and mostly die in that one small area. The whole spot is now littered with corpses. All visitor groups that go hang out there break down in a record time, ending up either fighting or wandering in daze in the vicinity. And why does all this violence and death happen? Because I set up a wall. Am I the 60's East Germany or Israel?

After stumbling on this discovery, I'm now thinking of doing further research to refine this process of fully automated corpse and weapon production. My capitalist senses are tingling and whispering there is great  profit in this, with minimal risk. What started out as a nuisance, ended up as a boost to income and defense, even if unintentionally. I have to find further means to promote disharmony and violence outside.

I've learned that certain individuals are resistant to psychic droning. I'm theorizing that if one were to gather a whole group of these individuals, and simply wait for the eventual arrival of an Ancient Ship, one could create an environment in which madness ensues quickly to everyone but your own people. Preferrably these people would also possess optimistic views towards life, or be otherwise shielded against hardship in general. Even if a rare outsider were to stay sane amidst the heavy background droning, filth, darkness, corpses, hunger and fatigue, that just means one would have another candidate for his or her colony.

This is how religions and cults begin.

...Bow before me.
(and please someone pick up the paper that I dropped. I have a bad back. Sigh.)

The esoteric order of Dagoooon! Woo! *cheer*

[skivvy96]

A tribals just throwing rocks at mechanoids for hours on end with the mechanoid just sitting there and shooting at them as they runn around throwing stuff at it.

[CounterFact]

One of my colonists, Jessy, got shot in the foot and it got cut off. This reduced her movement speed to 50%.
The next raid I forgot about this reduced speed and used her as a flanking force...
Needless to say that didn't work out so well, since they shot her before she could reach cover.
Guess where they shot her. The other foot! Another foot cut off, again -50% movement speed, giving a grand total of 0% movement speed.
She's been lying in bed ever since. I think she's been in bed now for several weeks, doing nothing but eating my food..

[skivvy96]

One of my colonists, Jessy, got shot in the foot and it got cut off. This reduced her movement speed to 50%.
The next raid I forgot about this reduced speed and used her as a flanking force...
Needless to say that didn't work out so well, since they shot her before she could reach cover.
Guess where they shot her. The other foot! Another foot cut off, again -50% movement speed, giving a grand total of 0% movement speed.
She's been lying in bed ever since. I think she's been in bed now for several weeks, doing nothing but eating my food..

Won't she get cabin fever and go mad.

[EscapeZeppelin]

She's been lying in bed ever since. I think she's been in bed now for several weeks, doing nothing but eating my food..

Won't she get cabin fever and go mad.

Probably, but with a movement speed of 0% if she does rampage at least it will be quiet. I'm imagining a lot of flailing about in bed.

[BenjaminJMartin90]

well it all started in the small colony Arc Jax the heroric leader was sawing wood when suddenly alarms rang the female of the colony was caught unaware as the bandit attacked her rendering her unconcious, Jax the heroric leader stormed out of the building chasing down the bandit who was carrying the female away before deciding to shoot her in the head........ true story