Corrupt-A-Wish

[mumblemumble]

Granted : However, this change means theres a political change where politcal correctness dies off in favor of examining objective truths, no matter how offensive or grim. Thankfully, people still realize murder is generally bad, objectively, and it leads to society working better. Religions work together, using their strengths and weaknesses to help each other, as do races, and the sexes, and everyone who was offended over anything they had even a shred of control over, ends up owning up to it and changing it.

Over the course of 5 years, drugs fade out of circulation, sex becomes less premiscuous,  black communities heal, transgenders push to embrace a new way of life in favor of being part of something bigger, and SJW's end up realizing they were just a bit silly.

How is this corrupted?...well.. .. I guess people being accountable for their actions, and wanting criticism is corrupted.

Essentially everyone becomes wise.

I wish valve would release halflife 3, except its a turn based tactical simulator similar to xcom, just to fuck with people.

[mabor0shi]

wish granted
valve releases halflife 3, except its a turn based tactical simulator similar to xcomand it "fucks with people". Most of all, you. Everyone hates the game and that Valve burned so much time working on it so that it will be another few years til HL4 comes out. HL3 is a steaming pile of shit, because it was made "just to fuck with people" and the information is leaked that it's all a result of your wish. Anonymous Half-Life fanboy hackers target you and make you miserable.
I wish for politics and social commentary to be left out of this thread (if you want to talk politics, go to the Fox News or Huffington Post forums or something) without having any effect on anything else.

[mumblemumble]

Granted, albiet your push is what causes tyranny to spread. Political talks are outlawed, and as laws are made more crazy, anyone who speaks out is jailed for "bringing up politics".  Slowly, people are oppressed, first alt right and christian, then the working class, then everyone. Gun control takes guns away from everyone but police and gangs, and the combination of the 2 end up ruling the masses with an iron fist.

I wish ketchup no longer was just mostly sugar, and was actually the awesome condiment it USED to be.

[catter]

Wait, ketchup is now mostly sugar?

I now won't ever have ketchup ever again! (Even though I didn't like it anyways)

Granted, ketchup is now an awesome condiment used by everyone, now the mustard business is shrinking to nonexistence. Later a rebellion starts over whether mustard is better or ketchup. This slowly turns into a war where you suddenly get killed just for picking up a ketchup jar in a diner. The world soon finds a reason to start WWIII. Thanks for ruining my life and lunch bro! 

I wish to be back in 2017.

[mumblemumble]

Fucking lol

To be fair, mustard is still great, even cheapo mustard....but old ketchup DID used to be pretty much a vegetable serving BEFORE the condiment was changed so damn much.

And as for not liking ketchup, you never had the old type, most likely, so how can you say.

...Granted, but since 2017 is already here, you just wasted your wish like a jackass

I wish the tribals of sambia new guini would stop assaulting their boys...

[mabor0shi]

granted= The tribals of Sambia begin assaulting their girls instead of their boys. The situation there actually improves, albeit only slightly. However, now it becomes a big news story and a lot of new facts turn up. You learn some things that make you regard those tribals as heartless savages. You accidentally say this in public, where someone hears you and they call you a racist. You insist it's about culture, not race, and a crowd gathers as you argue. Someone throws a bottle of corn-syrup catsup and a riot breaks out. You are beaten to death by hippy pinko liberal lefties, just like in that recurring nightmare you had going a few years ago.
I wish i had a sex robot, like the guy in Ex Machina.

[mumblemumble]

Granted, but the pressure and speed calibrations are off by a 0, and you get your penis violently ripped off. You then have to have an in depth court interview as to why it happened.

I wish more games had the  tough times / great victories setup that rimworld and xcom has

[mabor0shi]

LoL Good to know you are not as sensitive/easily offended as you led me to believe.
granted: All games are much more like RimWorld and XCom. Most people turn to video games for mindless fun, so the industry suffers greatly as a result and there is a huge upswing in the production and consumption of superhero movies. Suicide Squad 2 becomes the highest grossing film of all time and the world is plunged into a new Dark Age.
I wish I could have any video game I want, even the ones that don't exist.

[mumblemumble]

It was mostly because before, you came absolutely out of nowhere with it haha.

It was kinda worrying, and derailing a serious discussion, and this thread is anything but serious.

Granted, but they are all pirated

You have the FBI at your door, not only for piracy, but because other FBI agents came from other demensions to complain about the pirated games, and this interdemensional rift is ALL your fault... You got some explaining to do mister, hope you like waterboarding.

I wish ninjas assassins in Open xcom the xcom files weren't so god damn hard to see. Fucking camo lets them hide right infront of you.

[catter]

Granted, but now they are a blur of speed and you can't stop them even with the best gun.

I wish I wasn't a jacka$$

[Kegereneku]

Wish granted, you are now longer a jacka$$, just a regular jackass.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wish I stopped being sick today (with no increase of sickness in the future as a consequence)

[mumblemumble]

Granted, your body develops a new immunity tool which makes you violently avoid other sick people, sickening foods, and shitty attitudes, making you feel physical pain if you do something unhealthy.

I wish pewdiepie would buy out MSM

[catter]

He does, but you later hate his videos because he is always talking about his ownership of MSM and always uses his videos as an ad for MSM.

I wish I were my old self and was back to my own time and went back into my normal life style.

[Kegereneku]

Wish granted, however that old self is still unhealthily obsessed with continuing old gag and beating dead horse despite everybody else having moved on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wish for Epic Rap Battle of History to eventually resurface someday.

[mabor0shi]

continuing old gag and beating dead horse

It's funny because it's true. Also, gags & horses
granted: Epic Rap Battle of History becomes super popular. You tell people that you were a fan before it was popular, but nobody gives a shit. A remake starring Justin Beiber is released. It gets played everywhere, all the time. When you say the original is better, people just call you a hipster douchebag. The remake gets so beloved, Beiber is elected President of Canada without even running, then initiates the Beiber Solution program to eliminate people who enjoy the first Epic Rap Battle of History more than his version. Canadian spec-ops hunt you down and strap you to a chair in a bunker in Nova Scotia. They hold open your eyelids and make you watch Beiber propaganda until you like it. It takes a dangerously long time, because you are such a hipster douchebag. You survive, but now can only speak in Justin Beiber lyrics.
_{I wish for a pleasant surprise!}