RIMworld TV

[Nictis]

This is great, have you considered getting your skits published?

[JimmyAgnt007]

I would like to publish something.  Maybe not something based on someone elses IP but yes.  Ideally Id like to find an artist to draw for me doing a webcomic.  Otherwise Im writing some other things but it will be a while before they are finished.

RWTV is basically all just thought up on the fly.

[Komyets]

Haha, this is great, you're pretty creative and clever on the storytelling Such a kinky perv that Mayor!

[JimmyAgnt007]

Leaving medical.

"That was less than what I had hoped," Chet commented

"Agreed.  let's save the vomiting footage for next time we have an 'election' and need to rebut anything the mayor says."  Sari concurred.

Strolling quietly through the settlement a voice starts shouting.

"Help!  Some kind of strange bugs have broken through in the mines!"  The miner shouted not bothering to stop as he passed by.

"I'm getting my gun." Sari decided. "Go get Rudolph and tell him you got a chance for him to show how manly he is to the woman he's stalking."

"Oh, this is going to be fun." Chet relished as he darted back to hydroponics. 

Entering the mines Sari kept her shotgun ready as she followed the directions of other frightened miners.  Inside she quickly found the town Militia at the entrance of one tunnel.

"Careful Sari.  Strange bugs are in there and it's not..."  Sheriff Philburt paused as he saw Chet strapping a camera to the side of Rudolph's head.  "...very bright inside.  Safe enough though if you bring a lamp."

"Good call!" Sari put a miner's helmet on Rudolph and flicked it on.

Chet gave a manly nod and a thumbs up to Rudolph before pushing him into the tunnel.  He was viewing the camera input from a datapad and everyone watched.  Slowly he made his way towards the noise to discover a massive wriggling hive surrounded by insects the size of dogs and a larger one the size of a wild boar.  Rudolph began to wet himself and scream but the mega scarab was on him before he could turn.  The view on the camera panned away as the screaming turned bloody.

"Damn it!  Pan left damn you!  By the void gods, you will get back on track!"  Sari yelled.

Slowly with many sudden jerks, the camera was soon viewing the bloody face of the horrible maw now feasting on the innards of Rudolph.  Sari gasped in panic clasping her hands over her mouth.

"Oh no!" She whispered in panic.

"What?"  Chet asked.

"My shouting.  Can you filter it out of the audio track so they won't hear it?"

"Oh yeah, that stuff is easy." 

Sari sighed with relief and relaxed.  "Oh good."

They continued to watch the bugs feast until several more militia showed up with incinerators.  Chet and Sari watched as they discovered their new camera was also fireproof.  Quickly the bugs and what was left of Rudolph were burnt away and the mines made safe.

Later on that day, the settlement gathered to lay to rest the remains of Rudolph. 

"We are gathered here to say goodbye to..." The mayor spoke. "to...  um... Rudy."  His aid Stephen whispered in his ear the correction "Rudolph! Heh, I was close. Who gave his life so that we could study the insect hive before we killed them without anyone else getting injured.  His friends would like to say a few words" The mayor stepped away from the microphone.

Nobody moved and nobody spoke, merely looking about to see if anyone else did.  When it was clear that nobody would the mayor shrugged at the undertaker who flipped the burnt bloody remains into the hole before filling it in.

[Thane]

Poor Rudolph. He needed to level up his social and not spend so much time in the theater.

[Reddeath96]

What!? No trip to the doctor with the burnt ashes? You missed out on a good opportunity their. Lol. But good reading still

[JimmyAgnt007]

When someone is reduced to burnt remains its a bit late for a visit to the doctor.  Also it would be too well done for his tastes.

just trying to decide on what to do for the next chapter

[JimmyAgnt007]

With the funerary services ended, the colonists went back to work.  For most people that meant tending to the crops or animals.  The skilled few as craftsmen worked to make new goods while the artists immortalized colonists in statues.  Or in the case of Sari, on film.

"Break is over Chet.  We need something new and fresh."

"We are the only people putting anything on the air.  We could film grass growing and it would qualify.  Heck, some people might really like something that relaxing."

"They can go outside to do that crap.  I think we should..."

Several loud bangs in the sky caused the whole colony to look up to see drop pods arriving.  A single pod wasn't unusual but this was a cluster of them.  That meant a raid.

"Pirate raid!" Someone called out.

Sari and Chet bolted for the armory.  As the first pods were landing Chet was getting his hands on a charge rifle while Sari went for a shotgun.  They burst back into the daylight ready to fight and saw the new arrivals waving hello.

"Hi there!  We are traders looking to buy up some supplies for our trip home." The one in front spoke.

"Seriously?!  You come in drop pods just to trade?  What's wrong with you people?"  Sari exclaimed.

"Oh well you see it's a long trip and rather than walk all the way here and back we just wanted to take the fast way here."

"I see..."

"We brought plenty of silver and gold."

Sari noticed the sacks of precious metal, "Well ok then." Sari smiled before yelling, "You pirate scum will never take us as slaves!"

The man looked surprised and confused when Sari fired into his face, putting him down.  The rest of the colony who had responded opened fire and quickly the 'raiders' were cut down.  Once the shooting was over the mayor's aid came forward.

"What happened?  What were you talking about before?  What's in the bags?"

"Slavers, said we had to pick a dozen to be taken as slaves and they wanted food for their trip home."

"I see, and the bags?"

"Chains.  To restrain people with.  Chet and I can smelt them down, no need to disrupt other people's jobs any more than the fight already has."

"Oh very well." Stephen left and Chet walked over.

"So I am guessing we want to cut the footage of him and you talking?"

"Maybe, might be able to dub over his voice and put words in his mouth.  But right now you need to help me get all this silver and gold into a safe spot."

"Buying yourself a house?"

"I'm going to build myself a whole studio.  And a bar."

"So you killed, and got killed, a bunch of innocent, if slightly idiotic, traders, just to fund your fantasy."

"I prefer to think of it as collecting 'Idiot Tax'."

[wafflep90]

Well that escalated quickly, liking the story so far cant wait for what's next

[Thyme]

Sari is deconstructing the colony. She needs to be imprisoned. Nobody will step up against her. This is not going to end well!

[1 Kiwi]

I almost want to purchase the "Name in Game" bundle to get Sari put in. This is great!
- P.S. could you describe what Sari and Chet look like?

[JimmyAgnt007]

I almost want to purchase the "Name in Game" bundle to get Sari put in. This is great!
- P.S. could you describe what Sari and Chet look like?

Lana Kane and Cyril Figgis from the show Archer.  Thats who Im thinking of. 

[1 Kiwi]

One of my favorite shows. Does their broadcasting network happen to be called ISIS?

[NikodeemusA]

This miniseries is so fun to read, I wish that this could be a story told into Rimworld!

[JimmyAgnt007]

I had thought of doing it as a webcomic but it would take forever to set up everything correctly vs just writing it down.