Corrupt-A-Wish

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Granted, you instead die of a lack of oxygen because the ship is torn apart from not having a proper hat-shield.

I wish for healthy catto.

[catter]

Granted, but the "catto" is me and not your lost cat who came back as a zombie.

I wish for a bunker.

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Granted. However you are transported to victorian britain, where adding "er" to words was very popular. The point is, you get a bunker, or what it's called today; A bunk bed.

I wish for nuclear apocalypse, and a fridge full pf Nuka-Cola.

[catter]

Granted, but the Nuka-Cola is right behind a very angry Deathclaw.

I wish the bunker beder was in the bunkerer.

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Granted, infront of you a carpenter specialized in bunk beds appears in front of you. Sadly, you can't afford his services.

I wish for a cup of ramen noodles. I'm not the first one to wish this.

[catter]

Granted, but you are out in the middle of the Sahara in a sandstorm with no water nearby.

I wish to have enough money to pay this expensive carpenter to build me a bunkerer.

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Granted, your bank account is quickly filled with money, and you're arrested for money laundering.

I wish for an ant.

[catter]

Granted, but it will suplexes you into my jail cell.

I wish for a file (the paper kind and not the metal or nail kind).

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Damn you Catter! I stayed up to 5 AM to catch you posting, and it totally wasn't because i downed a glass full of Coca Cola 3 hours ago and i can't sleep because of it! Well, anyways...

Granted, however it IS a metal or nail kind.

I wish for a metal or nail file.

[catter]

Granted, but since the guards already took mine, they'll take yours as well.

I wish to speak to my lawyer.

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Granted. You contact your lawyer, however you can barely hear him over the phone and you misunderstand the strategy to win in court is to plead guilty.

I wish to take you out of prison.

[catter]

Granted, but it is before our trials and so we are fugitives.

I wish we could run fast.

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Granted, you run so F A S T that you surpass soundspeed and desintegrate due to air resistance and friction.

I wish to have Flash's suit that prevents things such as what hapenned to you!

[catter]

Granted, as the suit gently falls onto your particles, you realize that it is too late for the suit to help you as you went just as fast as me at the exact same time.

I wish to reintegrate after the cops stop looking for me.

[ManHuntingSquirrel]

Granted, you reintegrate after they stop looking for you but after you do, you crash into the police station.

I wish to reintegrate and stop on my tracks.